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Feb. 21st, 2010 01:12 amI go back to school on Monday and I'm really dreading it. Like, I have butterflies about it. I know that's silly. I wasn't even there when the shooting happened and no students were involved. However, I just feel..........unsafe. Like, I've always felt safe at school. Even after Columbine, I never worried about that happening here. But it makes me completely uneasy to think about having to walk into that building.
I also had a talk with Michelle today and she really hurt me. I'm trying to talk to her about how I feel and she just jumps in and starts telling me that she doesn't understand why I feel that way and I shouldn't worry about any of this since I wasn't even there. I was really upset. I'm really stressed about it. My face looks like a pepperoni pizza at the moment because that's how my stress has decided to manifest itself. I don't watch stories about the shooting, I don't read stories about the shooting, in fact, I don't even like talking about it, period. But I really felt like she was completely disregarding my feelings about it. I guess it is silly to be upset, but I can't help how I feel. I really wish I could get over this as easily as other people probably would, but I just don't know how to do that.
In other news, been watching the Olympics! Evan Lysachek was soooo on the other night! he hit all his jumps fantastically! And I really think the Russian guy didn't deserve the gold medal when next to Lysachek. Yes, he did a quad, but the other jumps he did were not pretty. He front loaded his program with jumps and didn't put any in the backend, where Lysachek put several harder jumps and scored bonus points. And if you went by the old system, where you had Technical and Artistic points, Lysachek BEAT the Russian guy on the TECHNICAL, not artistic. I love Apollo! I knew he wasn't going to get Gold tonight, not when I saw that two Canadians and two Koreans were in it. I knew that they would both keep him out of the top spot so I knew he had to win gold. And good for that little guy beating Shani! I was so happy for him, if you can believe it. The joy, just complete surprise on his face at winning made me smile.
Why the Olympics feel the need to shove tender moments in my face. I'm an emotional wreck right now, I don't need to know these tragic stories that turn me into a blubbering mess!
I also had a talk with Michelle today and she really hurt me. I'm trying to talk to her about how I feel and she just jumps in and starts telling me that she doesn't understand why I feel that way and I shouldn't worry about any of this since I wasn't even there. I was really upset. I'm really stressed about it. My face looks like a pepperoni pizza at the moment because that's how my stress has decided to manifest itself. I don't watch stories about the shooting, I don't read stories about the shooting, in fact, I don't even like talking about it, period. But I really felt like she was completely disregarding my feelings about it. I guess it is silly to be upset, but I can't help how I feel. I really wish I could get over this as easily as other people probably would, but I just don't know how to do that.
In other news, been watching the Olympics! Evan Lysachek was soooo on the other night! he hit all his jumps fantastically! And I really think the Russian guy didn't deserve the gold medal when next to Lysachek. Yes, he did a quad, but the other jumps he did were not pretty. He front loaded his program with jumps and didn't put any in the backend, where Lysachek put several harder jumps and scored bonus points. And if you went by the old system, where you had Technical and Artistic points, Lysachek BEAT the Russian guy on the TECHNICAL, not artistic. I love Apollo! I knew he wasn't going to get Gold tonight, not when I saw that two Canadians and two Koreans were in it. I knew that they would both keep him out of the top spot so I knew he had to win gold. And good for that little guy beating Shani! I was so happy for him, if you can believe it. The joy, just complete surprise on his face at winning made me smile.
Why the Olympics feel the need to shove tender moments in my face. I'm an emotional wreck right now, I don't need to know these tragic stories that turn me into a blubbering mess!
